Dating websites are depressing

Down the line, we can trade off and treat each other and enjoy the security in knowing there will be a “next time,” but for now, we both walked blindly into the same bar, so let’s walk out having equally invested in the last hour.

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New submitter garthsundem writes with this tale of digital love: "A newly published meta-analysis of over 400 studies of online dating (PDF) shows both its popularity (second only to meeting through friends) and its impact.More online daters report seeking a 'soulmate' online, and do so by searching through the wealth of available profiles.Why do I alternate between playing the damsel and the playing the demanding entitled a**hole? Out here, at a bar or restaurant, I work really hard to make sure that you know we are equals participating in a traditionally unequal transaction.You don’t order my wine and we split the check because we are peers. I have a job, you have a job, we’re all on a budget, and I did eat most of the sweet potato fries!You will try to split it, but he will pay, and you will stand to re-wrap yourself against the frigid wind.

You will part ways, and you will probably, almost certainly, begin again the next day with another “Hey there…” message from the next contender.

I write about gender on the Internet for crying out loud!

But every day, when I log into the dating site of my choice, I play the passive role, the receiver of attention, the awaiter of messages.

I go to my inbox and see who wants to talk to me and then I choose to whom I’ll respond.

Sometimes I send a “thanks but no thanks” to particularly sweet messages, but usually I’m so overwhelmed by the new things to read and the new choices in front of me that I ignore those nice guys too.

With those, you will send a few messages back and forth before he invites you for a drink.