It was a wasted, post-date thing and I had granny panties on and something resembling a sports bra. I feel pretty today because of my facial and blowout yesterday. I text back one fist pump, which I think is pretty witty. We are breaking all the rules of dating, but it feels wonderful to be real.
When you’re a bigger girl, you need all the help you can get to look and feel sexy. The last person I had sex with was a few months ago. Joe texts that he’s made a reservation at a fancy Italian restaurant in Soho. He includes lots of pasta and wine emoji — I really appreciate his enthusiasm. I have tears in my eyes telling him about making the decision. I am curious about it — he says he needs decorating advice. I’m impressed he bought it on his own, no help from parents.
asks anonymous city dwellers to record a week in their sex lives — with comic, tragic, often sexy, and always revealing results. Being thick, chunky, and/or fat while dating is hard — the struggle of it all basically consumes me. A few might look at my life enviously (I have freedom, full nights of sleep, etc.), but I think most look at me as a spinster. This week, a 36-year-old housewares designer who deals with ghosting and impotence: single, straight, Dumbo. I like to grab a coffee at the same spot every day. When people ask about my dating life, they have this “uch-poor-you” face on … so I get up, turn off the lights, and walk back slowly. I practice the sexiness-comes-from-within mantra with every inch of my body. “Sorry to bother you, but …” he says, and compliments my eyes.
He’s staying at an Airbnb for two months while he wraps up a docuseries he’s working on. They get shorter and shorter as we get older and older.
My parents suggested boxing because guys hang out at boxing gyms. I’ve been hit on a few times there, but the guys all felt like ex-convicts. In the locker room, I see a text from Joe — a Tinder guy who seems really into meeting me. He says he was invited to a restaurant opening tonight, 9 p.m., and would love to have me as a date.
I wear all black, obviously, and go with black jeans and a black cashmere sweater.
From my research it appears they dated for six years and broke up about three months ago. I order Mile End off Seamless: a huge smoked-meat sandwich and chicken soup.
I saw a dietician a few weeks ago and she gave me a list of “good,” “bad,” and “no-way” foods. Speaking of, a little something about my relationship with sex: I love sex. I’m in pure bliss when I’m coming — lately, I’ve been so hung up on my poor body image, not much about my life feels blissful. A guy from the subway; a woman from a board meeting. I kinda hope he’s one of those tiny guys with a huge cock …
Just as I’m buzzing my friend Catherine, Joe texts back that he’s upstate at his parents’ for the weekend.