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Thinking back, I didn't necessarily see my actions as bad or cruel; I did what I did, mostly out of curiosity, to see how far I could go before it becomes too late to change.

If they were not around, I'd pick up one of their yellow ducklings from the enclosed compound and cup it in my palms, holding it tight while the duckling struggled to break free from my grasp.One time, I brought the duckling to a large earthenware jar and let it loose in the dirty water, testing to see whether it would stay afloat.Instead I look away, choosing to use reason and rationale to explain away my unspoken fears.I tried to distract him by encouraging him to play more sports, like basketball, during his free time after school.Everything seemed subdued in the heat of the day: the dogs that hid under the stilts of the huts, the laundry hardening on the wire clothesline.

Walking through the kampung was like walking through a desolate place devoid of people, removed from time. They were poultry farmers, rearing chickens, ducks, gooses and a handful of turkeys that, to me, looked like fatter, uglier gooses.The only sounds were the occasional dog barks and the erratic clucking of chickens kept in small compounds bordered with mesh wire.I liked the stillness of a drowsy afternoon, where all human activities took a temporary pause and nature exerted its lonesome presence the gentle waving of leaves on knobby trees, sharp blinks of light through the latticework of branches, the humming of the forest.He likes to make people laugh, to feel at ease with him, to like him. He likes to tease them, and to draw giggles from them by tickling their ears and armpits and pinching their waists. My daughter thinks there's nothing wrong in a boy showing affection to young girls "You want him to like boys, is it? What limits, what boundaries, I ask her, but she conveniently ignores my question. A few days ago, I walked past by grandson's room, and through the gap in the door, I noticed that he was watching something on his computer, a grainy video with the volume set to low.Especially, he wants young girls to like him, and to this end, he works in a determined fashion, with an unwavering eagerness to please. It took a few seconds before I registered what the video was about, an act between a young-looking girl and two men.By O Thiam Chin My grandson loves to hang around young girls, especially those below 10 years old.