When their 16-year-old son dates, says the Northbrook, Ill., mother, "he can't leave one place without calling and letting me know where he's going." She knows his friends' parents and checks in with them now and then.
"It's a great way to keep tabs on the kids without making them feel you're breathing down their necks." Dr.
Any time you spend with other people - whether it's going out for a beer with a buddy or dating a woman who's not their mother - is time you won't be spending with them.
Parents who are unhappy, dissatisfied or insecure in love, however, go beyond limits and try to dictate or control how their teens treat their dates, the study found.These parents try to influence their kids to value certain things and act in specific ways.Guys often express our love for other people by doing (and buying) things for them.But while toys are nice, children need lots of verbal and physical demonstrations that you love them and that they're always your top priority (but not to the exclusion of everything else).While the reason isn't clear, the author suggests these parents may hold more conservative beliefs in general; many of the rules involved sexuality.
Ironically, in what other researchers have called the "Romeo and Juliet" effect, such rules may tend to drive teenage lovers closer; teens of these parents reported closer, more positive relationships.
Your social life will undoubtedly affect your children - especially if you get into a serious relationship.
But it sounds like you've given them the impression that their close relationship with you entitles them to an actual vote in the matter. You're their parent, not their friend, end of discussion.
These parents also had the healthiest relationships with their children.
Debby Shulman and her husband, Allen, fall into this category.
Aside from the boundary issue, your children may simply not want to share you with anyone.